Feel like you always fall out of love with your jobs? Does this sound familiar?
"In the beginning, I couldn't wait to get to the office. I loved the company, my boss, my peers and my job. Then, the excitement started to go away and I realized that it was all in my mind. The job I fell in love with is just like every other job I've had: It's repetitive, tedious and long. I end up feeling like a failure because I can't find a job that makes me happy."
If you can relate to this scenario, let me share a secret: Work is like peanut butter.
Phase one: The introduction
Think back to when you were first introduced to peanut butter. You were most likely a kid, who had tasted only healthy foods that were dull but good for you, like fruits, veggies, toast and crackers.
One day, someone put a sandwich in front of you and said, "Try this." You took a bite and your taste buds went nuts for the sweet candylike treat that was easy to chew and full of yummy flavor. Your little brain probably said, "Is this a mistake? Do they know what I'm eating?" At which point, you immediately thought, "I better show them I like this," and you wolfed it down.
The same thing happens when you go on an interview and like what you see and hear. Your brain gets really excited with the possibility of something new and delicious entering your life on a regular basis. You do whatever it takes to land the job, and then you celebrate like a 4-year-old when you get the offer letter. But let's return to our story.
The grown-up who gave you the sandwich is so impressed with the way you devoured it, you're told you can have it again. You opt to have it every day. If you could, you'd eat it for breakfast, lunch AND dinner.
Phase two: Boredom sets in
One day, you realize that peanut butter is a bit boring. It doesn't have the same appeal it did when you first tasted it, but now, it's been added to the "healthy foods" list and you're told you HAVE to eat it. The very thing that you were craving just a few weeks earlier is now something you loathe. You're given some new variations -- jelly, Fluff, no-crust, on celery with raisins. The presentation is altered, but it doesn't change the fact that you are really tired of peanut butter.
The same thing happens when you realize that your job is actually work; it's something you must do. You've agreed to do the job, so you need to show up and complete the work, whether you feel like it or not.
You try to liven up the job by taking on different assignments or learning a new skill, but it still doesn't change the fact that you must do this job. Perhaps you call in sick for a mental health day or plan a vacation. Yet, you still have to return to the job at some point. So how do you fix your aversion to work? Let's see how the peanut butter story turns out.
Phase three: Hatred is evident
You became so sick of peanut butter that you announce, "I hate peanut butter." You are given some other foods to try. First, you get liverwurst. You gag and ask for carrots. The next day, you get tuna; you won't even try it. On the third day, you are offered egg salad. You immediately ask to go to your room and skip eating altogether.
Phase four: Pleased to see you again
On the fourth day, peanut butter is set down in front of you, and you are actually pleased. There is your trusted friend, the food you can count on to appease your hunger without making you nauseous. You eat it and think, "Ahh, peanut butter, you are not so bad." You go on to develop a strong bond with a food that you know is not ideal, but reliable. You accept it for what it is and what it can do for you. You are satisfied.
Work is no different. You could go to your boss and let her know you are looking to feel more challenged but, if you can't be specific as to what you need and what you want to do, you'll most likely be given more work that you don't love.
Meanwhile, your boss may get upset that you aren't grateful for the efforts to help you and could resent your attitude -- especially if you say you don't want the extra work anymore and will just stick with the job you said wasn't working for you in the first place. I guarantee she'll assume you are looking to leave and will no longer want to invest time and energy into your professional development.
If you can work through the phase where you loathe the repetitive, unexciting nature of your job and recognize that the skills and experience you are acquiring are enabling you to do a good job without a lot of pressure or stress, perhaps you'll finally give your job a break and stop expecting so much from it. Your work is not always going to make you feel amazing and wonderful.
In times when you aren't "feeling the love," try to appreciate your job for what it does give you: a steady paycheck, benefits, a place to learn and build your skill sets so you'll always be employable, or the opportunity to build professional friendships that could help in the future. You could end up feeling a lot better about work in general.
Now that you understand how work is like peanut butter, why not take a peanut butter sandwich to your job tomorrow and be grateful for what they both provide -- sustenance.
J.T. O'Donnell is a nationally syndicated workplace columnist and author of the book "Careerealism: The Smart Approach to a Satisfying Career."
"In the beginning, I couldn't wait to get to the office. I loved the company, my boss, my peers and my job. Then, the excitement started to go away and I realized that it was all in my mind. The job I fell in love with is just like every other job I've had: It's repetitive, tedious and long. I end up feeling like a failure because I can't find a job that makes me happy."
If you can relate to this scenario, let me share a secret: Work is like peanut butter.
Phase one: The introduction
Think back to when you were first introduced to peanut butter. You were most likely a kid, who had tasted only healthy foods that were dull but good for you, like fruits, veggies, toast and crackers.
One day, someone put a sandwich in front of you and said, "Try this." You took a bite and your taste buds went nuts for the sweet candylike treat that was easy to chew and full of yummy flavor. Your little brain probably said, "Is this a mistake? Do they know what I'm eating?" At which point, you immediately thought, "I better show them I like this," and you wolfed it down.
The same thing happens when you go on an interview and like what you see and hear. Your brain gets really excited with the possibility of something new and delicious entering your life on a regular basis. You do whatever it takes to land the job, and then you celebrate like a 4-year-old when you get the offer letter. But let's return to our story.
The grown-up who gave you the sandwich is so impressed with the way you devoured it, you're told you can have it again. You opt to have it every day. If you could, you'd eat it for breakfast, lunch AND dinner.
Phase two: Boredom sets in
One day, you realize that peanut butter is a bit boring. It doesn't have the same appeal it did when you first tasted it, but now, it's been added to the "healthy foods" list and you're told you HAVE to eat it. The very thing that you were craving just a few weeks earlier is now something you loathe. You're given some new variations -- jelly, Fluff, no-crust, on celery with raisins. The presentation is altered, but it doesn't change the fact that you are really tired of peanut butter.
The same thing happens when you realize that your job is actually work; it's something you must do. You've agreed to do the job, so you need to show up and complete the work, whether you feel like it or not.
You try to liven up the job by taking on different assignments or learning a new skill, but it still doesn't change the fact that you must do this job. Perhaps you call in sick for a mental health day or plan a vacation. Yet, you still have to return to the job at some point. So how do you fix your aversion to work? Let's see how the peanut butter story turns out.
Phase three: Hatred is evident
You became so sick of peanut butter that you announce, "I hate peanut butter." You are given some other foods to try. First, you get liverwurst. You gag and ask for carrots. The next day, you get tuna; you won't even try it. On the third day, you are offered egg salad. You immediately ask to go to your room and skip eating altogether.
Phase four: Pleased to see you again
On the fourth day, peanut butter is set down in front of you, and you are actually pleased. There is your trusted friend, the food you can count on to appease your hunger without making you nauseous. You eat it and think, "Ahh, peanut butter, you are not so bad." You go on to develop a strong bond with a food that you know is not ideal, but reliable. You accept it for what it is and what it can do for you. You are satisfied.
Work is no different. You could go to your boss and let her know you are looking to feel more challenged but, if you can't be specific as to what you need and what you want to do, you'll most likely be given more work that you don't love.
Meanwhile, your boss may get upset that you aren't grateful for the efforts to help you and could resent your attitude -- especially if you say you don't want the extra work anymore and will just stick with the job you said wasn't working for you in the first place. I guarantee she'll assume you are looking to leave and will no longer want to invest time and energy into your professional development.
If you can work through the phase where you loathe the repetitive, unexciting nature of your job and recognize that the skills and experience you are acquiring are enabling you to do a good job without a lot of pressure or stress, perhaps you'll finally give your job a break and stop expecting so much from it. Your work is not always going to make you feel amazing and wonderful.
In times when you aren't "feeling the love," try to appreciate your job for what it does give you: a steady paycheck, benefits, a place to learn and build your skill sets so you'll always be employable, or the opportunity to build professional friendships that could help in the future. You could end up feeling a lot better about work in general.
Now that you understand how work is like peanut butter, why not take a peanut butter sandwich to your job tomorrow and be grateful for what they both provide -- sustenance.
J.T. O'Donnell is a nationally syndicated workplace columnist and author of the book "Careerealism: The Smart Approach to a Satisfying Career."
Search more than 100,000 Jobs by CLICKING HERE!